When you Have Certainty at the Moment of Truth
In my book Moments Matter, I share my first-hand account of how one defining moment can create a lifetime of purpose.
Over the past fifteen years, I have spoken to hundreds, if not thousands, of people who have shared their personal accounts of their “moments.” Hearing about their “moments” has further solidified my belief that everyone will have their own defining moment sometime throughout their lives.
I, too, have had more defining moments since my experience on US Airways 1549. Whether it was during my sales career with Oracle, meeting and speaking with extraordinary people, challenging family experiences, or swimming in the Hudson River or Coronado Bay with SEALs and Special Operators, these moments defined my life.
Through my time with my mentors, books, and training, I have learned that there are specific patterns. One of these patterns I have noticed is when someone faces their defining moment, the people who have grown from that experience have one thing in common.
They and I had certainty at the moment of truth.
I recently spoke at a First Responder event in Bellingham, Washington. These first responders have faced many challenging experiences throughout their careers. This conference aims to share strategies to cope with and overcome the uncertainties that come after these challenges.
After consulting with the event planner and my team, we chose for me to deliver my “Embracing Uncertainty” talk. I thought it would be appropriate for the audience at hand.
When I got offstage, I spoke to a few first responders before heading to the airport. I received very positive feedback from these folks, but I would like to wait until I get the responses from the event manager before taking any action.
I received the feedback this week, which was about 95% positive. However, a few responses said they wished I had addressed in more detail how I grew out of my traumatic life experience and have maintained a mindset of growth since.
After my recent swim with our Special Operators in San Diego, I attended the reception and auction and spoke with many of our heroes. The same theme was in those discussions: how did I bounce back and maintain the growth mindset? The mission of the Honor Foundation Swim is to support our Special Operator heroes who have gone through highly challenging experiences, translate their elite military expertise to the private sector, and grow from their experience, not go a different direction.
That feedback was great to receive as I am always looking to “up my game” and serve at a higher level, especially to those who put their lives on the line for all of us.
Since receiving this feedback, I have been noting in my iPhone how I and others I have spoken to over the past fifteen years have grown from their “moment.”
Most people have certainty at their moment of truth, but uncertainty enters after that moment.
So, for those first responders in the northwest United States, my military friends, and others who have or are facing their “defining moment,” here are some thoughts on some actions you can employ to embrace your uncertainty and grow from it.
Always remember that pressure is on the other person you may be competing with, so play your own game the way you know how. Believe in yourself first, as I wrote in my blog, The First Victory.
Next, decide to be different, as different is OK. That is the approach I employed when I went back to work the week after the plane crash. I had just survived a plane crash, and my life was going to be different as I experienced and witnessed many new things. So, how I approached my business and life would now be different as I am now a different person.
Be your own best and honest friend. What I experienced and what I learned from others, their “moment” was a “come to Jesus” moment. For many years, I told myself stories that put me, as Dan Sullivan says, “in the gap.” Once I started being straight with myself, I could put in the habits that helped me grow and execute and be “in the gain.”
Develop an alternative reality for your life. Take logic and then add some fantasy ( those things that have always seemed out of reach) to envision an alternative reality. As I wrote in my blog last week, Moving from Mind over Matter to Mind Becoming Matter, imagine the future possibility by envisioning and employ constructive delusion by seeing your glass overflowing, see what you expect to see and expect uncertainty, and then embrace it
And as I wrote in my latest book, The Limitless Life, you should never place limits on yourself because you create boundaries. Boundaries indicate where one thing ends and another begins. But you should expect barriers and obstacles that are put there to make you creative and resourceful. As I point out in all my talks, you must divorce the story of limitation and marry the truth of your unlimited capacity.
I recently had a call with two friends, one of whom is the chairman of an insurance company and the other whose son just won two gold medals in the Paralympic Games in Paris.
This call was riveting. I had the opportunity to hear firsthand the perspective of someone who runs a very successful insurance company and the mindset it took for his son to overcome a perceived challenge or disability that most people would give up on.
As I listened and interjected some thoughts, it was apparent that these two gentlemen and one’s son adopted a similar approach to embracing uncertainty and growing from it, as I detailed above.
Success leaves clues.
This is why I always end my talks with one common theme.
Find a mentor and be a mentor. You can learn strategies that can help you compress the decades it usually takes to get your mission into days.
That is why, in 2025, I will be looking to mentor 40 people who desire to learn these strategies and pass them on to someone else. If you want to be one of the 40, experience a limitless life, and unleash it, please email ea@davesandersonspeaks.com.
Remember, your pathway to growing out of uncertainty is
- Remember that the pressure is on the other person
- Decide to be different
- Be your own and honest friend
- Develop an alternative reality for yourself
- Never place limits on yourself
and you will be en route to having a limitless life, creating your own flight plan for your future.